change

peace family,

today is the last day of march. where in the hell is time going? i'm convinced that the earth is spinning faster, making time fly with it. it was just december. and now we've already completed 25% of the year 2006. i remember prince singing about partying like it's 1999 back in the 80s and me thinking about how far away that was. it left me to wonder, where will i be i be in 1999? i had so many goals planned out. and now here we are, 7 years past that futuristic 1999. no flying cars, no robots in the street, no perfect society, no end of the world. oh well. such is life.

i figure today would be a good day to post the theme behind some of my lessons learned this year. and wow did i learn a lot. i'm forever changed because of it. that's the beauty in life. the change factor. you can think you know something, but in one sliver of a moment you can realize that you didn't know a damn thing. and what should we do with this bucket of new knowledge? by all means we must apply it to our lifestyle. flexibility is key. our survival depends on it.

there is nothing consant in the universe. all ebb & flow and every shape that's born, bears in its womb the seeds of change.

so many times, we may possess the truth, but refuse to go thru the hell of applying it to our way of life. it's "easier" to hold on to our preconceived notions, irregardless of the difficulties they create. then wonder why we're struggling to be at peace. for example, we've all seen the story about the battered wife who chooses to stay with her no-good husband. she knows she's not happy, but can't remove the blockage that makes her stay in hell. the lack of application of her knowledge feeds her beaten condition. she's has trouble wrapping her brain around the idea that she can do much better without him. the change factor is way to much for her to handle. once she finally gets the strength to stand up for herself, embrace her self-worth, and leave this guy alone, she becomes free from the pain and the stains of bullshit that she's been enduring. we must defeat the hardships that block our path toward growth and development. knowing that any hardship we face, begin in the mind. we must conquer our demons there. nothing is ever as hard as it seems. we are the only ones capable of validating our mental state. residing on the square of truth will always set us free. embrace the facts and always think outside of the box.

key lesson:
be the water. water is flexible. always happy at the lowest level. it can't be destroyed, yet it can overcome rocks and stones.

expectations

what's the deal with all these expectations floating around? why do we ever expect anything from anyone? it's a sure way to experience disappointment. the greatest moments that ever came my way were the unexpected ones. so what's all this talk about expecting something? we, as humans, try too hard to control our friends, loved ones, coworkers, associates, the stranger that accidentally bumped into us on the street and so on. we want them to mimic our approach to life. put them in a box, and if they step outside of it, then "oh, hell naw. get your ass back in that box!!!" shouldn't we just live and let people be? in a perfect world, it would be nice to see reflections of yourself in everyone you meet, but this is not the reality. the people you come across on this planet possess their own mind. they have their own objectives. i am willing to offer respect to all of these individuals that walk the planet earth. i recognize that i am not here to judge anyone. how can i possibly know what's best for anyone? i can't. i can only focus on my actions and be a living example of what i would like to see manifest in this world.

since people can't be controlled, wouldn't it be easier to just associate yourself with people who are on the same page, going in the same direction & eating from the same tree as you. this way you'll understand where this person is coming from, even if you don't agree with his/her position on a particular topic. and if the difference in vision ever becomes too much, you can choose to love it or leave it alone.

here's a fable i love to death...
there was a nice woman that found an injured snake outside of her home. she brought it inside and helped it back to perfect health. soon after, the snake bit the woman. as the venom seeped into her veins, killing her slowly, she asked the snake, "how could you do this too me?". the snake replied, "bitch, you knew i was a snake."

be your own sole controller and let people be themselves.

peace love and respect!

bush

so...america has the village idiot as its leader. this is a clear tale sign that we're in trouble. not only is this gump supporting war and wasting billions of precious dollars, he's really not smart. seriously, he's just as dumb as the carpet i walk on. i understand that he was pissed at the bombing of the twin towers in 2001, but his so-called retaliation has went way too far. what i don't get is how do you plan to attack terrorism when you're a faithful terrorist yourself. he's a living hypocrite that gets off on terrorizing entire nations. and by far, the world's biggest bully. why in the hell are troops still in iraq? do we remember the the purpose of the invasion? what happened to the plan of eradicating weapons of mass destruction. oh that's right, there weren't any. it was all a lie. a big fat one. i guess it was all about the oil. i really don't get how one is allowed to go to another place on the planet and dictate how the inhabitants should run their government. it seems rude. as far as the way the system is set up over here...healthcare sucks, proper education is non-existent, way too many people are living on the streets, not to mention the various issues of drugs, guns, racism, police brutality, and the list goes on and on and on. and if i'm reading this correctly, the plan is to set up a government similiar to the one that sucks major ass here in the states. these fucking bloodsuckers of the poor are getting away with murder. literally!! i truly think that politics is a huge waste of time. who wants to hear lip service. unless the lips of these vampires are kissing my ass.

btw,
there have been 3,000 soldiers that have lost their life in the past 3 years in iraq. compared to the 30,000 - 100,000 iraqis that have lost their lives. this shit must cease.

war...what is it good for? absolutely nothing.

gangs

i CANNOT believe that gangs still exist. this is completely idiotic to me. here in chicago, another innocent young girl has lost her life while she was in her home. how did she die? some fucking coward decided to get a gun and shoot mulitiple shots at his missed target. i mean really. bad enough, these young punks think it's cool to claim a 3 block radius as their own and let their lives deteriorate into shit, beefing with others for futile reasons; but it's a whole different issue of taking someone's life unnecessarily. what happened to the good old days when you used your fists and mouthpiece to calm your anger? it's pretty damn hard to miss your target when he or she is right in your face. these gang members that claim they're so hard, are really just as soft as baby asses still in the womb. "i'm too scared to fight you head up, so i'll drive down the block real fast and shoot everybody on the block because this one guy pissed me off so badly." i mean...grow the fuck up. get a life. talk it out. it's not like you're going to hit your target anyway. and if you really wanted to get the person you're pissed at, then fight them, head up. i'm so sick and tired of these screwed up assholes messing it up for everyone. there really is a problem when a 10 year old girl can't play at her own your birthday party without a bullet flying through her window and taking her life. talk about crashing a party. this shit is ridiculous and it needs to stop. not to mention the fact that this sad event happened 8 days after a 14 year old girl lost her life while in her living room. she was an honor roll student and lost her precious time on this planet the same way, drive by. both tradegies took place just 3 blocks away from each other. i just wanna smack all these chumps in the face with a sledge hammer so they can wake up out of their "i hate me and everyone else" coma.

btw,
where in the fuck are all these kids getting guns anyways? and where are the parents of these unruly beings? if you really want to impress me then go after some of the folks running our government. c'mon, stealing money from the needy to buy their children luxury cars at 16. that's who the beef should be with. not the someone in your neighborhood who looks like you and have the same socioeconomic issues as yourself. don't we all enjoy laughing with our friends, watching a good movie, making love with our significant others. where are all the hugs and kisses?

we're living in a CRAZY WORLD.

yin yang

the rat race

why in the hell are we allowing other people to dictate to us where we need to be for money? you know what i'm talking about. the 9-5, the 8:30-5 gig (or whatever your master thinks your hours should be). we barely spend daylight hours in our home. rent, mortgage just wasting away. we're basically paying for storage. we wake up knowing exactly where we'll be M-F. this is extremely played out. it's time for us to get some cash flow coming in so we can stop working for the man. it's true. if you don't have a dream of your own then you'll be working damn hard to support someone else's. we need to take our destiny and livelihood in our own hands. financial independence is where it's at. just imagine. your money working for you. literally. buy assets...kill the liabilities. check out www.richdad.com.

btw...
since i'm not ready to give up my job just yet (lol), what's all this business about being at work on time? i never and i mean never get to work on time. i can try and it never turns out that way. but i figure, what's the harm? i'm alive right. i mean none of our moments are guaranteed on this planet. so how can my job assume i'm running late, when something could've happened to me. for real. when i show up, ppl should be clapping and hugging me b/c i'm alive, damnit. rarely do they think of this though. they're just ready to tell me about myself and put their observations in my reviews and stuff. like it matters. i can, however, promise my employer that i will never do a no-call no-show. that's completely irresponsible. i may do a call and no-show OR a no-call and late-show. never a no-call no-show.

love peace and balance!

my prototype

i used to love a man. then i realized that it was never love. i idolized him. he was my prototype. he made my heart ache. i sat back patiently waiting. debating if i should just leave it alone. leave him alone and clear my mental home. yet he possessed me. he could do no wrong. i'd call he'd answer only when it was convienient. i used to stay anxious feigning for his voice to end the ringing. panting like an animal thirsty for love. lonely with the feathers of a dove winking. i was content with my demented thinking. emotionally done. remained positive that he was the one. heart burned like fire whenever his name slipped off the base my tongue. sprung like tulips in june i was doomed to an eternal hunger. i assumed he had to feel the same. had feel my pain, yearn for my name and the fire that burns deep within me. desire me, as he was the light that used to cleanse me - he went dim and became the very dream that woke me. broke me free. free from the disease that had me twisted in his sick melody. kisses draped in infinity. i spent years bathing within his invisible passion expressed by a fine mist. i now exist alone without his tongue with a twist. dissed by the object of my affection. reflecting on how i missed my chance to dance with his intoxicating presence. didn't grab him when he desired my essence. i was distracted by other men. looking for greener grass. moments have passed and introspection has taught me to mourn and move on. i was the next one to survive the loveless storm.